No Blame

This is Part Two of strategizing how to design your 2022 riding plans. In this video, I discuss ideas to consider for improving the technical skills of you and your horse.

Last week, I talked about taking time to reflect on and design a 2022 plan for you and your horse that resonates with you.

We talked about several pieces of the plan to consider. This week I talk about decisions regarding your horse’s and your technical skill development.

First, you and your horse are a team. In teamwork, of course, it takes two or more to achieve the desired result. It’s not a solo act.

As a rider, we are the leader of the team with our horses. It takes two to tango.

I often see amateurs and nonpros feel as if they are responsible for every weakness their horse has or they have. They think they should know most things ‘by now’. But the reality is they’ve never had the opportunity to learn those skills.

Your horse brings their own set of trained technical skills to the table. You bring your set of riding skills. It’s best not to feel burdened by the pressure you put on yourself to be more advanced than you are.

Yes, you do need to be as objective as you can, perhaps with the help of a coach or professional. Do your best to understand what horsemanship and technical skills you need next and how to learn them.

The same is necessary to consider for your horse.

In addition to a professional trainer or coach, there is additional information to be found online or by hearing the comments of those more experienced than you.

I think it’s fun to think of your job as a rider like being like a detective. Turn over every rock. Do your homework. Pick what information resonates with you for your riding and to improve your horse. No one person or resource knows everything. Have fun gathering pieces of information wherever you find them. That is the way of learning to be a good rider and horse person.

Above all, please do not blame yourself for being behind. You are never behind. You are on a magnificent – and very personal – adventure with your horse. Enjoy every moment.

Leave a comment and let me know what you think!

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14 Comments on No Blame

  1. Roz on Sun, 5th Dec 2021 2:37 pm
  2. Great advice – thank you so much 😊 We are all on this journey and it is a never ending learning curve. Hope you enjoy your time away – probably bittersweet but a lovely way to celebrate for your son. Big hugs Roz

  3. Amy Evans McClure on Sun, 5th Dec 2021 5:07 pm
  4. Thank you Barb! As I navigate this new terra incognita without the physical presence of my soulmate husband who perished last year, I’m finding your encouraging talks about riding, horsesmanship, learning to be a bright light on my walk to the barn and in the wider paths of living. abrazos, Amy

  5. Katrina Thompson on Sun, 5th Dec 2021 5:53 pm
  6. What a way to start the week, Thank You. 🥰
    I feel very inspired to keep up my journey with Raven and feel proud of where we are headed and how we will get there. You are the best. 💖

    Katrina & Raven 💜

  7. Jamie on Sun, 5th Dec 2021 7:04 pm
  8. I love your comments about age and just staying in the present. My horse & I are senior citizens. We’re having a great time doing what we can. You continue to inspire me. Thanks!

  9. Claire on Sun, 5th Dec 2021 7:30 pm
  10. Dearest Barb-
    I can’t add a thing more gracious than what is already said. I do hope you had a peaceful and contented Thanksgiving-and I so appreciate your loving spirit and giving heart.

  11. Camille Abbott Camille Abbott on Sun, 5th Dec 2021 8:45 pm
  12. Love this! I think it is a question of figuring out how to marry your skills with your horse’s skills and progress from there.

  13. Gayle on Mon, 6th Dec 2021 4:07 am
  14. Thanks, Barb. Always encouraging and optimistic, your thoughtful comments help us lay out a path that we are inclined to incorporate and buy into. Interesting and appreciated.

  15. Jessica Bollinger on Mon, 6th Dec 2021 6:28 am
  16. Thank you. In every relationship we are in, it is the differences that provide a learning situation. Being curious is important. Not blaming.

  17. Laura L Musemeche-Yarbrough on Mon, 6th Dec 2021 8:51 am
  18. Inner Peace & Inner piece shows the connection in all aspects of life. That will be added to my riding mantra of grit and grace. Namaste on my horse.

  19. DeAnna Ball on Tue, 7th Dec 2021 1:05 pm
  20. No big scorecard in the sky. Enjoy the here and now. Start setting goals for 2022. Thanks, Barb!

  21. Kris Barnes on Tue, 7th Dec 2021 8:20 pm
  22. Thank you Barbra, you always seem to have exactly what I need to hear!! I am always so encouraged and empowered by your messages <3 God bless you! Kris

  23. Janice on Wed, 8th Dec 2021 8:00 am
  24. Hi, I listened to this twice to make sure I didnt miss parts, the first time. One part I took notice of is the comment of there being so much free information out there. That is so true. I appreciate everyone who has put in the time and effort to do that. I have found it to be a wonderful resource for me as I’m sort of a late bloomer where horses are concerned. To find dedicated time and people who I may live closer to who could provide the kind of training I needed, 7 yes ago, was a huge challenge. All of those free resources filled a large gap and opened up my world to nearly endless possibilities. There are so many wonderful resources, out there and I thank all of you.

  25. Kathy Clemons on Tue, 14th Dec 2021 12:27 pm
  26. Good motivation for the 2022 year coming.

  27. Sandra on Tue, 4th Jan 2022 11:59 am
  28. This resonates so much with me. I place o much blame on myself. I recently got an OTSTB and training for beginner levels of dressage and eventing. Although I trained a horse in the past I doubt my abilities to “reprogram” a race horse. And the I’m too old to do this ( both hips replaced and broke neck in car accident) keeps popping up. I really need to start beating myself up so much and remember is all about a love for horses and to enjoy the jouney. Thank you!

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