3 Ways to Survive Change

Did you ever notice how we all crave for things to be certain? We avoid change like the plague. We love thinking that FINALLY, we found the way it’s going to be … I like it and I don’t want any change.


Funny, the most dramatic case of this is my life was when our son Zane was an infant. I was willing to do whatever he needed, of course, but it kept changing. As a young Mom, I would think, “Ok … I’ve got it now. He wakes up once a night at 2:00 and then goes back to bed until 6:00. I can plan around that.” Sure … that was good for about 2 days. And then it changed. I kept trying to figure it out.

But now, years later, I finally understand that things are always changing, even when we don’t realize it.

In our horse lives, when we first started riding, we just knew what we knew at that time. We thought we’d always ride the same horse … always be in the same barn … always go to the same shows.

But then, things changed. Our beloved horse got arthritis. The trainer moved. We were forced to take a break because of an accident, or financial reasons … or whatever.

And then we were on unsteady ground again.

As I continue to learn … and study great mentors in personal performance and personal growth, I have come to understand that those who continue to excel …even through change, have some things in common:

  • They too are uncomfortable with change. But herein lies the difference: they don’t resist the change. They trust themselves and they trust their journey. They might say something to themselves like, “This is hard. I’m really sad … or maybe mad … but I’m strong.” So, when the trainer moves or you move away from your horsey friends, you know you will survive … and somehow find your way.
  • Those who flow best with change believe there is some good that will come through the difficulty. Maybe they don’t know what it is, but they truly do believe it exists. They also know that only time and a willingness to see things that way will tell the tale. They don’t know how things will turn out … but again they trust their journey. This is a strong personal belief of mine. It has gotten me through some tough times in my personal life … or in my horse training life when a horse got sore … or a show didn’t go well for me … just to name a few.
  • Next, those who flow best with change not only believe something good will come to pass … they actively look for it. For me, maybe not being able to ride one of my favorite horses, helped me see the good things in one of the other horses … things I had missed. For you, perhaps if you have to stop riding for a while, you can use that time to travel to big shows and watch … something you’ve wanted to do for years.

Yes … change is really hard … and it’s sad sometimes … and it almost always seems to kind of suck. But, after you grieve a bit (and give yourself time for that) … tell yourself that you are strong. Yes, you can survive. And yes, there is a gift in the misfortune. And when you’re ready … yes, go searching for it.

That’s what I have for you today. Scroll down and leave a comment for me. I would love that.

Print This Post Print This Post    Email This Post Email This Post   


20 Comments on 3 Ways to Survive Change

  1. Sue on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 2:31 pm
  2. Thank you for this reminder and I do mean “Thank YOU” from the bottom of my heart. It seems the last couple of years I’ve been in the midst of this struggle for a multitude of reasons and it’s nice to know I’m not alone here. Looking forward to the coming season, post crummy weather, with fervor.

  3. Laurie Swafford on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 2:45 pm
  4. I was in a very bad car accident. 8/14/2017 broken arm and shattered femur. It has been 18 months my leg did not heal . I will be having surgery 2/27. I have another year of healing. Change happened to me very quickly. I had to find a home for one horse. Still have one my life is very different now . Very sad.

  5. Barbra Schulte on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 2:46 pm
  6. So sorry, Laurie. Blessings. Barbra

  7. Cindy Newell on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 3:15 pm
  8. I know how hard change can be for some people. Major changes like loss of a job, horse or family member are super hard for me. But I have learned to embrace change and it has made all the difference in how I feel about it. Barbra, thank you for all of your beautiful and very relevant messages.

  9. Cass Antle on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 3:16 pm
  10. Change – oh glorious – Change!
    Always challenging me to be open to the unexpected.
    Thank you, Barb for your comments and
    reminding me that change is a part of this incredible journey of life and letting it sink into my soul on all kinds of levels.

  11. Val Waggoner on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 3:21 pm
  12. I always enjoy your wisdom,thank you . You are so right,the better I accept changes, the happier I am. Val

  13. Helen Taliaferro on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 5:06 pm
  14. This comes at a good time for me as our barn is closing and 20 of us are trying to make a move and stay together!! Thank you!!!!

  15. Meredith Rainwater on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 6:00 pm
  16. Barbara I don’t know if you remember me or not, but I’ve been a great fan I’d yours for years. I just want to tank you for your inspiration and always your positive out look. You are truly a gift to all. At 72+ years we Jim Armstrong and I are selling our small ranch we have lived on for over 26 years and thinking about moving to Arizona. What a change for us as we live in southern Oregon where it’s green, wet and cold! I didn’t really realize just how much this change would affect both of us. I have one good mare to ride but weather and smoke from fires in the summer have not let that happen. Last year I bought three yearlings that are prettying well bred and as crazy as it may seem I just can’t hang my tack up yet. Thank you again and don’t ever change your positive out look as I know very well what you have been through.

  17. Michelle on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 6:07 pm
  18. Thank you! I did lose my trainer and have spent quite a while getting over that. It’s time to regroup and restart!

  19. Carol MacGregor on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 7:16 pm
  20. Thank you Barb for another insightful part of life–Change!!! That is a big one but like you said, it is inevitable. I love the insight you’ve given as to how to “embrace” Change to be helpful to our lives, rather than a hindrance. Those were good examples that you gave, also!!

  21. Lois on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 8:41 pm
  22. I have recently had a fallout with a long time close friend over my relationship with my trainer a d friend. Change is here at my doorstep. I Am Strong and I Will survive this. Just hearing myself say it makes it so (: Thank you Barbara. This was very timely for me

  23. Rebecca Compher on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 10:35 pm
  24. Perfectly said I will embrace and go with it thank you

  25. Renae L on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 11:42 pm
  26. Thanks for your wisdom! I had my first rides on a new horse this week- it is a new beginning that I’m excited for.

  27. Tonya Holmes on Sun, 17th Feb 2019 11:50 pm
  28. Just have to say “ I love changes,I love changes “
    The gratitude journal help me see the good in the change. Just saying!

  29. Wanda Flanagan on Mon, 18th Feb 2019 5:38 am
  30. Barbra
    Again your wise word of the change situations will ground anyone who is going through things!!
    Thank you soo very much

  31. Angelia Ledet on Mon, 18th Feb 2019 6:56 am
  32. I wish I still worked.

  33. Cookie on Mon, 18th Feb 2019 7:57 am
  34. Thank you, just what I needed to hear this morning.💕

  35. Belinda Williams on Mon, 18th Feb 2019 9:04 am
  36. Barbra, you continue to enrich my life with your wisdom and ideas. I am forever grateful!

  37. JoLInn Hoover on Fri, 22nd Feb 2019 2:57 pm
  38. Oh Barbra, I can’t even begin to tell you how timely this is in my life right now. Thank you for all you do to help so many…..!!!

  39. Kelle Thorne on Mon, 25th Feb 2019 7:09 am
  40. Hi Barbara,
    You are so right, chance sucks! After a few to many falls off my baby I was teaching to let me ride her, well the ridding was going so wonderful EXCEPT when she spooked her turnaround was so fast I just couldn’t stay on.😢 Sadly after several falls my already messed up spine made me take time out! It’s been two years now and the surgeons still haven’t fixed my back enough to ride. Change sucks but being able to brush and just be around other horses, watching other riders has tough me a lot! Thank you so very for your story!
    CHANGE SUCKS but I’m stronger for it!!

Tell me what you're thinking...
and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!

This blog is kept spam free by WP-SpamFree.